Will there be another spring?

and i ended up where i began
wandering aimlessly on streets where sparrows sang
looked at the faded buildings that were once painted white
which now seem like a dying plant cursed with blight
sleep evades me...thinking of the time gone by
can't remember the faces even though i try
so many lies have cobwebbed the recesses of my memory
that i inflict fellow souls with my stale stories
my eyes seem vacant to them lacking the earlier vigour
but i am unable to break free from this endless stupor
moments have faded...and i am filled with shadows from within
a question i dare ask...
will there ever be another spring?

One windy morning

One windy morning i walked along an idle street
watched with wide eyes
as tiny leaves falling from drooping trees
began to cover the barren concrete
the delicate leaves felt like colorful snowflakes
together with the cold wind blowing across my face
and i wished life could always be full of such simple treats
that in some forgotten utopia i could just be a tiny leaf
floating away happily in the northern breeze
settling momentarily to add color to an aging grey concrete
surprising some stranger even while i lay askew in their wake
but my journey wouldn't end with that..make no mistake
for i would go for a spin the next time wind blew
as i belong to no one and my callings are few
to be free from all that is stale and untruthfully binds
to wander in a new direction everyday inducing smiles...
alas! i came out of my reverie as unrepentant horns blared
a sigh escaped past my lips and my eyes unknowingly teared  
i took one last look at the falling leaves as i started to pull away
consoling myself that it's a frayed dystopia i live in anyway...

Trysts with Disasters

 

Searching for disasters I set out on journeys unknown
and I return victorious with a chastised heart and bloody bones..
Picking stray thorns on the way I bejewel my crown
I hide my worries and straighten my frowns
things of beauty they seem at first
with the lavish promise of quenching my thirst
The thirst to belong...the thirst to recklessly laugh along
the slow approach towards being inevitably forlorn
It's sad how the thrill is lost to possessive shackles that bind
blasphemy seem the vows of  "ever thine ever mine"
As enticing they had appeared before...now they only repel
all that is left to be done is bid a pedestrian farewell
Debris here debris there debris everywhere
A wounded heart teases...whispering "who said disasters would be fair?"
I dare to say...that it is not what every soul masters
to emerge from the filthy wreckage of dancing with disasters
The bones heal and the heart too starts beating again
but sadly...the desire for a tryst can never be slain...

A Conversation with Life

If smiles were charms i would sew a bracelet to keep u captive

If words were what u sought i would pen poems galore

If passion in earnest u desired i would live like i have never before

If u wanted to run free i would paint u wings..urge u to fly high

An endless day if u demanded i would bring u fireflies

If u only saw what i see that keeping secrets is not pilfery

I would have shown u a bright moon in a foggy mirror even

But u intend too many puns..more than i desire

Every time u give me rainy reality when i dream of fire

I am like that genius under a lamp post who wants to unlearn everything

But u give me only autumns when all i want is another spring...

Confessions of a raindrop...

i am a raindrop running down a glass-pane
overlooking a thousand lakes beneath
my frenzied fall...a quotidian event to the creatures crooning inside
some glued to boxes with bright pictures flashing by
some just chatting away...some painfully shy
some wearing a forlorn expression
as if it had been this way forever...and will be evermore
but one i noticed out of them all..who witnessed ever so closely...my dramatic fall

in my race towards the ever-welcoming earth

i saw the longing in those eyes
desire...desire to be as reckless as me
if nothing but free

how ironic i felt 

since i myself am governed by gravity!
it is not by choice that i fall in abandon
neither am i as free as one perceives me to be
my descent is a thing of beauty nonetheless
the rush towards my destiny...into a warm embrace from where i shall rise once more..
to paint the endless skies with rainbows galore
so i willed the one who had a shine in her eyes

to embrace what lies ahead and break free of the ties 

to embrace the smoldering desire...to be free...since freedom lies in the way you see..

to become the reckless raindrop she imagined me to be.....

tell me god..what is my cure?

in a world stained with imperfection i seek something pure
tell me god..what is my cure?
people claim what is rightfully not their own
raiders reap happily what some have so carefully sown
there are ample treasures at every turn to satiate every soul
sadly no one believes in the pot of gold at the end of a faded rainbow
cloudy desires have lured an innocent moon...have stolen its right to shed light
now the tired travelers are only left with a ghastly endless night
even the black and white have lost their battle against a stealthy grey
it is not sins anymore for which one must pay
stone cold reality bites for every dip in the shadowy pool of life
every time the heart dares to emote..gets stabbed brutally with a silvery knife
waking up from rosy dreams seemed to be an easy fare
but what about nightmares in the guise of dreams that are too painful to bear?
a murkiness has tainted the fabric of hope..that once used to allure
tell me god what do i seek now? what is my cure?

Let me be..


      let me spill a little time before i save some more
let me lose a couple of miles before i meet with what's in store
                              let my heart falter a bit before it picks up rhythm again
                     let me do a bit of madness before i continue with being sane
                                               let me be a tad reckless...a break from the usual careful self
                                 let me enjoy being sad before into bliss i again delve
                       let me curse a while before i go on ensuing praises
                let me fling epithets somewhat before returning to cultured phrases
                                   let me don the devil's cloak..the perpetual saintly halo is such a bore
let me be the embodiment of bad for a try...
                                       a respite from the mundane good that all seem to adore
                 let me cry for a moment or two before i fall back on the pedestrian smiles
                                              let me bask in greed before i revert to my ideals of no-guile
                              let me mess up once..for why should it always be perfect?
            let me fake it for a change 'coz genuine is so yesterday's effect!

reality realized..

FootPrints of a Vagabond...

tired m i thinking of what 2 do!
all i can come up with is that i should do something new
i should steal colors from a butterfly's wing
try to add some to mine
but wait! i don't have wings! i can't fly..
can't go home no matter how hard i try

so i would borrow some wings...maybe from a sparrow dancing in the dust
but before i set myself free, foreseeing it in the tarots is a must
i see myself dull and frozen beneath a blue lake
to whatever i look back, i see ashes in my wake
did i not leave blooms at all?
how sad i feel for those who have witnessed my fall..

i am tired..i want to rest
but to the strong ugly winds i have lost my little nest
yes i want..i want to do something new
but it seems choices i am left with are indeed very few
i want to swim to the surface
to watch the sun sink in the lake once more
i want to feel warm again..turn my reality into a lore
but i guess i want too much...as my mirages would dissolve at the merest of a touch
i can only walk on the blazing sand with a scorching sky above
i have given it up all that i had once loved

call me a vagabond...mark me as a pariah who has only memories to spill
for i can see no fountain where i can get my next fill
empty from within...ruined to the core
i have wandered long enough from one to the next door
with some i have left a misty smile...with others maybe a tear or two
only proof that i was there..that it was all true..